Chapter Four: He's Not My Mate
Monday Night Leading into Tuesday
Emerald's POV:
My blood ran cold, it couldn't be, could it? Is that why Elijah gave her a lingering look before he left? Are they pranking me, please, Moon Goddess? I'm not that strong to bear such a prank. My train of thought is disturbed when Leah squeezes me into a bone-crushing hug. I'm so numb that it didn’t even hurt. I feel the tears well up in my eyes, but I deny letting them fall.
"Em, believe me, I didn't know. I just saw Eli after the break. We weren't really talking much through the summer, and I never actually met him in person. If I even had the slightest hint, I would've told you. Please believe me, Em. Please, Em, say something!” said Leah, while her tears soaked my shoulder.
I didn't know what to say. This was happening. It was actually f*****g happening, I had a feeling yesterday at the back of my mind, but I refused to acknowledge the thought that Eli and I wouldn’t be mates. I should've believed my inner conscious. Maybe I wouldn't be as stunned as a robot now. Maybe she's wrong, right? I know it's rare to confuse the mate-bond, but it could happen, right? Now I was a ball of nerves and I didn't know what to do.
However, I couldn't let Leah think I hated her. She was one of my best friends, and has always been there for me. If she is Eli's mate, and when midnight comes, and his wolf awakens and claims her, we'll see what to do then I suppose. But, deep in my heart, I knew there wasn't much to see. I would have to back away from their lives. The Moon Goddess chose them for one another. No matter how much it would hurt, I would never deprive my two best friends of such a sacred bond that I knew they craved since I'd known them. So I squared my shoulders and held Leah's face in my palms, wiping the tears that fell on her cheeks with the pads of both my thumbs, and then hugged her trying my best to hold down my tears from falling.
"Leah, I'll say this once, so listen carefully. I am not mad at you or even Eli if he knew or did not know about the mate-bond between you guys. I knew there might be a chance where he wasn't my mate. But, if it is the case that you and Eli are destined, you will always have my blessings. I would never come between you two,” I said, with all the confidence I could muster up now while holding back my tears.
I meant whatever I said to Leah, and I wanted her to know that. Leah hugged me as tight as she could while nodding without saying a word. I could still feel her tears run down my shoulders. I whispered sweet nothings in her ear to calm her down while rubbing her back. Once she stopped hyperventilating, I grabbed a tissue and fixed up her makeup and gave her a smile.
I know what I'll ask right now might plunge her back into tears, but I had to know for my sanity.
"Leah, I know whatever you just told me is the truth, and I'm grateful you told me before midnight. But I just want to ask you one question, if that's okay with you?” I said, trying to keep up my façade that I was okay with whatever I just heard.
"Of course, Em, ask me anything you want!” she said while hiccupping after every word or so.
I sighed and held back my tears. Then, I looked her in the eyes while holding both her hands in mine, and giving her a feeble smile I asked,
"Are you sure he is your mate, like absolutely one hundred percent sure?"
I knew asking that was dumb, and she wouldn't be making such a thing up, but I still had to ask for my own subconscious. She just nodded her head, her eyes welling up with unshed tears again, and bowed her head in embarrassment and shame. Before they could fall, I wrapped her in my arms and said,
"Sweetheart, hey, hey, look at me,”
Leah looked up but did not meet my eyes. I gently grabbed her chin and made her look at me.
"Sweetheart, you have nothing to be ashamed or embarrassed about. Yes, I'm a little hurt….,” which was a lie. I was devastated, but I continued consoling Leah regardless, "…but it isn't yours or Eli's fault. This does not affect us at all. You'll always be my best friend and so will Eli. I want you both to be happy with one another because that's what the Moon Goddess wishes!"
"I'm so sorry, Em, I really am. Please just always remember we're best friends. Bitches over d***s any day, every day, remember!” replied Leah giving me an apologetic smile.
I burst out laughing. This was the Leah I knew. Our clown would always make me smile no matter what. Leah was always there for me, whether to ward off bullies, be my shoulder to cry on or my tv show binge partner, she was there. I knew it would hurt tonight watching Eli take Leah into his arms and lay his claim on her, but I would be happy for her. I would be for them. Elijah was getting someone he deserved and so was Leah. I knew they would be happy together.
I helped her back up on her feet, and she went to fix her makeup while I set mine. Then, we left our quarters and hopped into Leah's Maserati to go to the pub to meet up with the rest of the group. As we drove in comfortable silence, I could not help but think if I would find my mate anytime soon.
Would he be like Eli or even Luca at that?
I looked at Leah from the corner of my eye, and saw that she was finally relaxed and giddy. I envied her at that moment, maybe I'll be like that once I find my mate. We reached the pub, but before we got out, I held Leah's wrist and said,
"Leah, I think you should tell Eli right now. I'll call him and ask him to come out so you guys can talk it out alone before you have to face everyone else,” Leah just nodded and wrapped me in another bone-crushing hug.
"I'm sorry, Em," Leah said.
"Hey, don’t say that, you did nothing wrong. I'm happy for you. I am. Trust me. Eli is one lucky guy to have you as his mate. So savour and cherish this time, sweetheart, and don't worry, like I said before, I'm repeating that we've been best friends and will remain best friends,” I replied and squeezed her hand.
After that, I called Eli and asked him to come out. Not even five minutes later, I saw Eli coming out of the pub in his signature dark blue jeans and green button-down with his curly hair slicked back. I went up to him and gave him a hug and said,
"Eli, always remember I'll always be here for you, and whatever happens now will never change anything between us. We were friends before dating and we will still be friends. I wish you every happiness." I kissed his cheek and turned around to walk in just as Leah came forward and grabbed his attention.
"You're here, I thought you and Leah were about to miss out on your boo's birthday,” said Hannah.
If only he was my boo I thought to myself. Hannah noticed my change in mood at the mention of Eli, and she pulled me into the corner where we were out of earshot from everyone.
"What's wrong, Em? Did you and Eli have a fight?" asked Hannah concerned.
It was like Nurek Dam broke, I grabbed Hannah and just cried my heart out, all while she kept asking what happened and whispering sweet nothings in my ear.
"He's not my mate, Han…
He belongs to someone else…
Why does the Moon Goddess hate me so much...?
Am I not destined to be loved? Why doesn't anyone want me…?” I quivered out on her shoulder while my tears soaked her bare skin.
"Em, you need to calm down and tell me what happened."
"Eli and Leah are mates. Eli doesn’t know yet, but Leah caught his scent when they came to our quarters earlier and claimed him,” I hiccupped while telling her. Hannah just opened and closed her mouth like a fish, dumbfounded.
After helping me up, she wiped off the mascara that ran down my cheeks. I could tell she was choosing her following words wisely.
"Emerald, I know asking you if you're okay right now would be the biggest understatement of the century. I just want you to know I'm here for you, and so is everyone else. The Moon Goddess doesn't hate you, you'll see that when you find your mate, he'll be the centre of your world. Trust me, love, I would never lie to you…” before Hannah could finish, I hugged her and said, "Let's go back out. I want to show my support for Leah and Eli, it's a big day for them and to be honest, as much as I don't want to be here, I don't want them to think I'm upset with them for something they have no control over.” Before Hannah could protest, I pulled her out of the corner and walked back to our friends.
As I near everyone, I can see the pity in everyone's eyes, I guess Eli and Leah must have told them. I see Eli looking at me with an apologetic look from the corner of my eye. I turn and walk up to him, enveloping him in a friendly hug.
"I'm happy for you and for Leah. You guys will make an awesome couple, but don't forget about me," I said the last part while poking his arm with my finger and smiling.
"Emerald, I'm sorry. Please don't think I kept it from you. I had a feeling when I came into your quarters earlier, but I shrugged it off, and wanted to wait till midnight to see what happens. I wanted to spare you any unnecessary tension with information that I thought may not be true".
"I'm not upset, Eli. Please believe me. I know what the mate-bond means to you and Leah, and nothing makes me happier than to see my two best friends getting something they've always dreamt of,” so I tell Eli while I give him one last squeeze, and go towards Leah. I give her a big hug and tell her how I'm happy for her.
She just smiles and hugs me back. Then, when she lets me go, I turn and see everyone's eyes on me to see if I'm okay.
As much as I wanted to curl into a ball in my bed and cry my eyes out, I didn't want everyone's pity. So I sent a silent prayer to the Goddess to give me strength for the next few hours, pushed my shoulders back, smiled and said,
"Guys, I'm not dead. Come on, get your butts up and let's have some fun. We still need to ring in Elijah's eighteenth, and we’re already down two hours till twelve".
Even if they didn't want to, they all headed towards the bar with me in tow.
Three shots and one beer later, I forgot about my unfortunate situation, and was just swaying to the beat with Hannah and Ela. We ended up getting cut off by Axel since the three of us were becoming a handful for him to deal with. Like him, Eli and Leah were the only comparatively sober ones among us.
"Alright, my chipmunks and Chipettes, grab a shot, and let's start the countdown to my boy Eli's birthday," Ian tried saying while slurring his words.
We all started the count from ten, and as soon as we were about to finish, Eli ran out of the pub while Leah rushed behind him. We knew that he was okay and his wolf had awakened and was shifting. We downed our shots, and we were about to head back to the dance floor when Axel pulled us back to our booth.
"Han, I'm calling Beta Luca to take you back home. He and the Alphas will already be pissed as f**k that I didn't call one of them earlier and let you get drunk,” said Axel to Hannah's chagrin.
He turned to me and told me to stay put as he would take Ela and me back to the academy once Luca was here to pick Hannah up. Then, just when Axel stopped being the possessive-ass brother/friend he was, we saw Eli coming back in with a pair of red basketball shorts on carrying Leah bridal style. The way they looked at each other with so much love, adoration and pride was a kick right into my stomach, sobering me up entirely.
Everyone went to them and congratulated them for finding one another. As soon as my turn came, they squirmed a bit in their spots. I hugged them with a smile and told them I was happy for them for like the hundredth time tonight. After that, I remembered the loneliness I felt in my heart as I backed away from the booth with my head on Hannah's shoulder, waiting for this night to be over.