Becca.
After the conversation with James the day before, I felt the need to escape for a few days. I wasn't sure what I was going to do or where I would go, but the confusion I felt made me unsure of everything.
I was going completely against my beliefs and acting a fool.
However, deep inside me, I felt nothing but love for him.
Love… I couldn't believe I could still feel such a thing after Chad.
Yet, with James, he made me feel like anything was possible.
Sitting on my bed, I took in my open suitcase and stacks of clothing I had been folding. I had no idea what I was doing, but the thought of leaving him broke my heart.
How had this man complicated my life as much as he had?
Perhaps I needed to just come clean with him. Tell him how much I cared about him, and see if there was a way to make the chaos go away.
Picking up my phone, I hesitated and then dialed James' number. I wanted to tell him the truth. Tell him I loved him, and I never wanted to part from him.
The notion was foolish because there was no way he loved me. With a deep sigh, I waited for him to answer. The only problem was the sound of his phone ringing came from down the hall, and James was supposed to be at work.
Frowning, I stoodt and padded my way out into the hall to see James' door partly closed. For him to come back, and not even tell me he was here, was out of character for him.
“James?" I whispered, pushing the door open to see his white dress shirt splattered with blood lying on the floor. My heart raced as my breath quickened.
What the hell had happened? “James?!" my shrieking voice called out.
Pushing through the panic, I rushed the few steps towards his bathroom and spotted him half naked, standing in front of the sink, with blood splattered across his hands and droplets on the side of his face. “Oh, my god! What happened?"
His eyes met mine, and within them was so much disgust, I wasn't sure if I had done something to him, because never once had he looked at me like that before. “Nothing, Becca. Just give me a moment, okay?"
“Excuse me… don't tell me this is nothing, James. What the hell happened?"
His eyes turned cold for a moment as he let a heavy breath escape him. “I got into a fight. Now go. I need to clean up."
James getting into a fight didn't make sense. He was disconnected from me in a way I have never seen him before. To make matters worse, he was pushing me away.
“With who—" I asked, hoping it wasn't what I thought.
There was only one person I know of that he may go toe to toe with, and that was Chad.
Chad deserved to have his ass beat, but I didn't want James to get involved with it. I didn't want any blood on James' hands, and if James hurt Chad that bad, there would be vengeance from his family.
“It doesn't matter now. Get out, and let me clean up," he snapped.
The tone of his voice was beyond unrecognizable. He had never spoken to me like this, and if he thought I was going to take it, he had another thing coming.
“No. I want f*cking answers now, James. Whose blood is this?!" I yelled back, watching his eyes widen in surprise.
“You don't want that answer. Now, don't make me ask you again."
“It's Chad's, isn't it. You went after him after I told you not to, didn't you?!" Shaking my head, I turned and walked away from him. “I'm done… I can't do this anymore."
“Excuse me?!" he yelled before my arm was snatched and I was pulled back to him. “You're not leaving me, Becca. This was for you. To get you the retribution you deserved."
“For me?" I gasped. “This is only going to cause me problems, James. His family will come after the both of us. How could you let yourself do that?"
With thin, tight lips he narrowed his gaze at me. “Because no one touches what's mine."
Looking up into his eyes, I saw the desperation, the raw passion he had for me and even though I was pissed, my core clenched with anticipation. “F*ck you."
“Oh, f*ck me?" He all but laughed as he pushed me against the wall, pinning my arms above my head. “Is this what you want, Becca?" he whispered with a smile.
“Shouldn't you be saying that's what you want?" I snapped, before his lips captured mine with a heated passion that caused a moan to escape me as his free hand pulled my shorts off and he slipped his fingers deep inside my tight c*nt.
“You're not leaving me," he growled before the head of his c*ck pressed against my folds, and he thrusted roughly inside me.
Was this an ideal moment to have sex? No. I didn't care, though. I was addicted to him, and the sex was ten times better when he was angry.
“You want me to stay?" I moaned softly as he thrusted into me over and over again. My nails dug into his hand from where he had my wrists pinned.
“You are going to stay," he replied, nipping at my bottom lip.
Harder and harder, he f*cked me against the wall. As if all the built up tension he had right now was finally being released, and I was the only outlet that gave him that satisfaction.
It wasn't until he smirked that I realized the excitement in it all. Releasing my wrists, he wrapped his arm around me and carried me towards the bed with his thick erection still buried inside me.
My back hit the blankets of his bed as he continued to please me. His mouth upon my erect nipple, and my fingers in his hair. “F*ck…" I moaned as I felt close to coming undone.
It was moments like this that set my soul on fire and constantly made me question whether leaving was a good choice. He was a drug I had become addicted to, and I never wanted it to stop.
“Dad?" A voice we were both too familiar with said just as he tipped me over the edge, and I came hard, screaming out in pleasure as the door to the bedroom opened, and in stepped Tally, wide-eyed and mouth parted in absolute shock.
“What the f*ck!" she screamed in anger. “I f*cking knew it! I didn't want to believe that you were the one betraying me, but this?!!"
“Tally, wait.. It isn't what you think…" I said as James and I pulled apart, and I stood from the bed shaking my head and rushing to her. “I wanted to tell you…"
A slap echoed across the room as the sting of her hit rang through my face. The bruise that was already there hurt worse from the contact, and tears quickly filled my eyes.
I had betrayed her, which wasn't what I had planned to do, but as fate would have it, she found out anyway, and the betrayal stuck.
“Taliana!" James yelled as he grabbed her and pushed her back. “Don't you dare f*cking strike her."
“She's a f*cking whore!" Tally yelled. “You're no friend of mine, you f*cking bitch!"
I was at a loss for words about what I was about to do. My heart was breaking knowing how much I'd f*cked up by doing this. Then on top of it, I'd lied and kept it a secret from her.
Nothing would ever be the same, and the guilt weighed heavily on my heart.
“Tally, I'm sorry… please listen to me," I said as I pulled on my clothes. “I can explain."
“No!" she yelled again. “How long has this shit been going on? Are you guys serious or are you just trying to steal my dad's money? Cause he would never take you seriously!"
“We're not together," James replied with a clenched jaw.
“Well, that's a relief," Tally snapped, staring at me with a murderous glint in her eyes.
My eyes cast towards James, looking for him to explain or elaborate. Yet, instead, he looked away from me, back at his daughter. “Stop it. It's just sex, Tally. She is an adult, and we were both bored. There is nothing more to this, so stop acting like you haven't done the same before."
“So she means nothing to you," Tally asked, staring at her father. “You don't care for her?"
“What?" James scoffed. “Of course, not. She knows this is just sex."
James' words were like a knife to my heart. I knew we weren't official, but to hear him be so dismissive towards me took me by surprise. The time we had spent together had meant a great deal to me.
Hell, I was in love with the man, and he barely stood up for me to his daughter.
Instead, I was just some girl he had been f*cking.
“That's how you see things?" I asked, as he turned his gaze towards me. “That's it?"
“Becca, you know very well what this is, and Tally is clearly not happy."
Shaking my head, I pushed past them. “I'm done, James. F*ck you both."
I was a fool to ever consider the idea of James and I. To think he and I could be more than we were. The past few weeks had been the best of my life, and yet it had all been fake.
Grabbing my clothes, I shoved them into my suitcase and made my way around my room, grabbing everything else. Only when a knock came at the door did my heart all but stop, and I froze in my place.
“Becca… open up, it's me," James said from the other side. “We need to talk."
Snatching the door open, I sneered at him, narrowing my eyes. “What is there left to say? You made it clear what you thought about me, so I'm leaving to appease you and your f*cking daughter."
James quickly shut the door behind him and gently grabbed my arm, pulling me towards him. “Don't go. I didn't mean it. I was just trying to calm her down, Becca. You know I care about you."
“Really?! Because to me it looked like all I was good for was for a quick f*ck. I'm not wanted here, so I'm leaving. I'll get a hotel or something."
Pulling away from him, I turned and continued packing my things. I was really done this time, and through all the anger, I forced myself not to cry.
I couldn't give them the satisfaction of my tears.
“Becca, please… let me figure something out—"
“Why is she even home today? She wasn't supposed to be back till tomorrow."
“The last show was canceled or something—" James said, quickly cutting himself off when he realized what he had just done.
With wide-eyes I turned to him, “You knew… you knew she was coming home, and you still let us get caught? How could you?"
“Because, Becca. I didn't want to have to keep you a secret anymore," he admitted, causing shock to fill me. He did this for his own satisfaction. Never once did he talk to me about telling her.
“We could have used words, James! Not letting her walk in on us f*cking!"
This showed just how much he actually cared. It wasn't about how much money he spent or the fancy places he took me. I didn't need any of that.
All I wanted was him, and instead, he didn't take my opinion into account with this.
He just did what he wanted.
Zipping up my bag, I grabbed my things and pushed past him, making my way down the stairs. Tally's voice carried from the living room before I spotted her standing there, talking on the phone.
No doubt she was telling her mother the truth.
“Becca, please wait… don't go." James said, calling after me.
“F*ck that! She is leaving!" Tally screamed, storming towards us. “I don't want to see this bitch again!"
“Go f*ck off, Tally. All you ever cared about was yourself."
Turning towards the door, I made my way out. A taxi pulled up to the front that I had ordered while I was in my room. Heartbroken, I tried to understand where I went wrong.