Chapter 18 - Speak To Me

(Gabriella)

I slapped my hands over my face before flopping onto the bed, I felt like my heart was ready to explode.

I had my first kiss..and it was unlike anything I've ever imagined..and he..he even kissed me again! How is this real?

Jamie Sinclair is like a dream come true...I always believed in soul mates and true love..and as crazy as it is to say this..I think he is mine..he has to be.

There is no way all of this was just random.

I rolled over before grabbing Butterscotch and kissing him on the nose.

Now what do I do though? Does he..does he expect me to kiss him all the time now? Or will things be awkward after this?

I need to get dressed..

I jumped off of the bed after setting Butterscotch down and walked towards my new closet. I quickly grabbed a black t shirt and grey sleep shorts before walking into the bathroom and changing.

I couldn't wipe this goofy grin off my face..that kiss playing through my mind over and over as I couldn't help but squeal.

I quickly brushed my hair and took a deep breath before heading towards the door.

I slowly opened it and peeked out, wondering if he was waiting in the living room for me.

I slowly crept out of the door, my bare feet not making a sound as I smoothly made my way down the hall.

I peeked around the corner, and there he was, sitting on the couch.

I watched as he lifted his leg and leaned back but quickly changed positions before shifting and fixing his hair.

Was he nervous too?

I took a deep breath, psyching myself up and stepped into the living room.

My feet quickly padded across the floor as I plopped into the seat next to him, taking him by surprise as I lifted up, kissing him on the lips quickly.

That's what couples do right? Now that we are going to be married, I want to do everything a real fiancee would do.

Or is that being too forward?

Jamie blinked down at me in surprise before a soft smile pulled at his lips, his head bending down as he inched closer to me.

"What was that for?" He asked, making me shrug before biting my lip nervously. Maybe he didn't expect me to act like that..

"You are so beautiful." He whispered, his hand reaching up and cupping my chin before releasing my bottom lip from my teeth.

Jamie closed the gap, his mouth resting on mine as he expertly moved it across my lips, making me flutter my eyes closed as my body began to lean back instinctively until I was now flat on the couch.

Jamie came down with me, his lips not leaving mine once as his tongue gently slid across my flesh, making me gasp.

He seemed to like that because the next thing I knew his tongue was in my mouth, my body pressing against him as butterflies flooded through me.

I had never felt this before..this aching and wanting..

I let out a whimper, my tongue moving bravely as I brushed against his in response, wondering if I was doing this right as he continued to kiss me.

I kept my hands flat on his chest, his firm muscles tensing beneath me as I gripped his shirt tightly.

I could do this all night! Is kissing always like this?

I felt my panties suddenly turn damp as I pulled myself closer to him, brushing up against something hard as he seemed to flinch before pulling back.

His chest rose and fell heavily as I panted beneath him.

I searched his gaze, wondering if I did something wrong as I looked away in embarrassment before letting go of his shirt.

"Hey, no..I didn't stop because I wanted to..I stopped because I had to." He explained hastily, seeing I was obviously confused.

I furrowed my brow, unsure what he meant by that as he reached up, brushing my hair to the side before helping me sit up.

"I don't want to take things too fast..I know this is new for you and I don't want to rush anything." He explained, making me pout as I went to reach for my phone.

I quickly typed out my message, feeling frustrated as I flashed him the screen.

"But I didn't want to stop..I liked it."

I wrote, making him blink rapidly as he tried to hide the smile that threatened to pull at his lips.

"I liked it too, but I want to take my time with you. I want you to be sure about this." He said, and I began typing again.

"But..I feel sure..I mean..I understand that I don't know a lot..but you can teach me."

I showed him my text and he suddenly began coughing on the air he just inhaled, making me reach for a bottle of water and hand it to him.

"Are you okay?" I signed and tried to mouth as he nodded his head and looked away from me in embarrassment.

"Yeah..I'm fine..that just caught me by surprise." He admitted, making me blush as I looked down at my hands.

I did read some stuff in books..but it is different doing it in real life. Like kissing..I didn't exactly understand what to do..but then Jamie started to show me.

"Hey, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you feel bad. You just keep surprising me more and more." He laughed.

The sound of it made me feel a little better as I peeked up at him before typing out another message.

"I haven't done any of this stuff..but I know I liked what we just did..and I read a few books.." I explained making him cock his eyebrow before smirking.

"What kind of books?" He asked, making my eyes widen..I didn't expect him to ask that..

"Just..romance ones."

I wrote, not going into the full extent as he nodded slowly, humor filling his face.

"I see..well, I will teach you whatever you like, but let's take it slow..we will start with kissing first okay?" He offered and I nodded eagerly before sitting forward and sticking my face out, puckering up my lips.

Jamie let out a burst of laughter before cupping my face.

"Why don't we eat some dinner first..or I'm afraid we never will." He said sweetly and I dropped my lips open before nodding.

I guess that's a good idea..I am pretty hungry.

"Okay..what are you in the mood for? Chinese, Italian, cheeseburgers, Mexican?" He named off the list as I pondered his options.

"Oh, I know..pizza.." He declared as my eyes lit up before bouncing up and down excitedly.

"I take that as a yes." He laughed while I smiled up at him brightly.

After Jamie ordered the pizza, he set his phone down and glanced over at me.

"Gabriella I wanted for ask you something." He suddenly stated, making my nerves shoot up as I looked at him curiously.

"Well..I was thinking..if you are open to this..would you let me try and help you speak again?" He stated, causing my stomach to drop as I felt that anxiety creeping up.

I bit my lip anxiously as I darted my eyes away from him..he wants to help me speak? Does that mean he doesn't like how I am now?

"I know it isn't that easy..and I don't want to change a single thing about you okay? But the thought of hearing your voice..if it's a possibility..wouldn't you want that too?" He asked, making me look into his eyes as I found myself nodding.

I would want that...more than anything...but I don't know if I can.

Jamie reached up, his palm cupping my cheeks as I leaned into him and fluttered my eyes closed.

"We don't have to start now..but when you are ready..just know I'm here okay?" He stated as I gazed up at him.

"Now I'm going to kiss you okay?"

I couldn't even respond before he pressed his lips to mine, chasing all of that anxiety away as I melted beneath his touch..

I have a feeling it's going to be very very hard to say no to Jamie..I feel as if I would do anything for him..and if he wants me to try and speak again..I guess I can't say no to that either..I just don't know if I can..