(Willa)
I couldn’t help but pace. I felt like one of those cartoon characters that lit up the screen in the background. Emmett didn’t have much experience with TV, but he was obsessed. I was too nervous about unpacking that or even forming a thought about whether I wanted that to become a regular thing or not.
“I wish I could distract you.” Caspien wrapped his arms around my waist, pulling me back from my pacing.
I settled into him and let his scent wash over me. It helped for a second until I remembered why I was stressed out. A moment later, I wiggled out of his arms.
“I would tell you not to run a line on my floor, but I really could care less about it.” He frowned at the floor, a playful smile crossing his lips as he watched me. "What are you thinking?”
I paused, giving him a look. He knew what I was thinking.
“Say it out loud. It might make you feel better.” He crossed his arms, leaning back against the wall separating the kitchen entrance from the open living room.
“I made contact with my ex for the first time in years.” I threw up my hands, glaring at him, hating that I was saying this out loud.
“Go on.” He motioned with one hand. I got distracted by how his other arm tightened, protesting against his shirt with the movement.
“Ex doesn’t cover it. Is it even an ex in werewolf terms?” I looked at him, but I didn’t expect an answer. “My child's father, the Alpha of the pack of my birth, my destined mate chosen by our Goddess herself.”
“That sounds better,” Caspien agreed.
“Doesn’t it?” I almost smiled despite myself. “That guy is practically deciding my fate,” I chewed on my lip, looking at the back of Emmett’s head, that had the same shade of brown as Nolan's.
“He’s not, though,” Caspien said, bringing my attention back to him.
“I don’t know what he’s thinking; I don’t know what he will do. I don’t think I ever really knew him,” I admitted, my brows tugging together. I stopped pacing, and Caspien wrapped his arms around me.
“What’s the worst that could happen?” He whispered into my hair.
I pulled back just enough, so I could look into his eyes. “Are you serious?”
“Just playing devil’s advocate.”
“My son gets taken away. I have to co-parent with Nolan. I’m forced to move back to Blue Ridge.”
Caspien growled, pulling me tighter. “That won’t happen.”
“Just because you say it won’t doesn’t make it so.” But I wanted to believe him. I really wanted to.
“I don’t think you would be forced to do any of that. Worst case scenario, awkward visits, and you’ll get some money from him.”
I sighed. I knew that. Logically, I didn’t think that Nolan could take Emmett, and deep down, I knew he didn’t want him. But the what-ifs were eating at me. He was my baby, my life. The reason for my existence shifted when I first time I looked into his eyes.
Okay, maybe not the first time. I had to get through some post-partum anxiety mixed with my normal depression, which was just a sparkling cocktail of fun garnished with sleepless nights.
But when I eventually came back to myself and saw him, really saw him. I knew that life, as I knew it, would never be the same.
Everything that I did from that moment on would be for him.
I never thought anything would come between us, could possibly break us. I never thought that Nolan could just claim him on a whim.
Something brought me back from my swirling thoughts. “Your pocket is buzzing,” I whispered to him.
“Maybe I’m just excited to see you.” he pulled back, grabbing his phone.
“Was that a joke?” I grimaced.
“Okay, I don’t really joke, so yes.” He shrugged. I laughed at that.
“I knew I was funny.”
“Just answer.”
Caspien looked at his phone and went stiff. He slid into his Alpha mask.
“Yes, okay. Good. You have it?” A pause.“Officially? Okay, bring it here.”
His shoulder sagged a bit when he hung up the phone. It was almost imperceptible, but I knew what to look for.
“Cas?” I grabbed his arms, studying his face. His eyes focused on mine. His eyebrows pulled together for a moment. “What happened?”
“You used a nickname,” he breathed.
“No, the phone call.” I smiled. “Is everything okay?”
“Yes, he got it. Nolan signed away his rights. Had a lawyer and witness there.”
“Really?” I didn’t quite believe it.
“Really.” He took a deep breath. “It's official. He's all ou-yours.” He gave me a smile that wasn’t entirely genuine.
I pulled back and clutched my stomach, my lungs filled with air for the first time since I signed that paper this morning, which felt like a lifetime ago.
“Really?” I asked again.
Caspien was smiling down at me with a genuine smile this time. “Really, really, I told you.”
“Not the time.” I smiled at him.
“Fine, I won’t bring that up again,” He pulled me into his arms and swung me around.
I laughed loudly. I couldn’t stop. I almost had the most essential thing in my life taken. I knew it wasn’t that dramatic, but that’s what it felt like. I felt like I got Emmett back even though I never lost him.
“Put me down.” I laughed, trying to slap his chest.
He pulled me to him, but I pushed away, stumbling a bit back on my feet.
I rushed to Emmett on the couch and took his cheeks in my hands. A confused look crossed his face. He tried to look behind me at the show he was watching, but I tackled him into the couch.
“You’re mine.” I poked his side, earning me a giggle, and held him close. His small arms wrapped around my neck.
“I know, but Mama, I was watching something,” his little voice scolded me, and I pulled him up.
“You’re mine,” I repeated, “Let’s cuddle forever, never letting go, not even to pee.” I wrapped him in my arms, and he laughed at that.
“Can Cassy come?”
I barked a laugh.“Sure,” I ruffled his hair, and he lay on my chest.
He was mine. I wasn’t going to lose him. Ever. It was official now.
- - - - -
The doctor came soon after we got the news and checked over Emmett. He looked surprised and reported that Emmett seemed to be in perfect health but wanted him to continue the last few days of antibiotics to be sure.
“I told you I was better,” Emmett crossed his arms and gave me a stare.
“Well then, I guess you didn’t need all those cartoons this morning then.”
Emmett’s eyes widened, and he looked at Caspien for support.
“I’m staying out of this.” He backed away with his hands up.
“Why don’t you go upstairs and get back in your clothes? And brush your teeth again. Germs love when you’re sick,” I made a grossed-out face.
“Yuck.” He stuck out his tongue, trying to look down at it.
He insisted he had to get back in pajamas after Holden left this morning and wanted the ‘couch bed’ that Caspien made. He claimed that he could only go back to the couch with pajamas on. Neither of us contested that sound logic.
“Can I show you the rest of the packhouse?” Caspien asked when Emmett bounded up to his room to change.
“This is the pack house?” I glanced over my shoulder at the sprawling city beneath his wall of windows. I didn’t really think about where we were. I assumed just his apartment somewhere, but I didn’t think he would take Emmett back to the packhouse.
“Yes, the new one. We kept the old one for pack members that want to live in a more traditional packhouse. This is ours.” He shrugged, which was more of a slight raise of his shoulders.
“Okay, I guess.” I looked up to the second floor to where Emmett went.
“No pressure, I just want to show you around. But I’m also perfectly content staying here.”
“Okay.” I thought it over.
“Okay, to what?”
“Okay, show us.” I shrugged. I don’t know if I was still on a high from Nolan giving up his rights so fast, but I didn’t see the harm in this.
“Really?” He looked slightly taken aback. “Nevermind.” He coughed. “It's final.”
He reached out to shake my hand, and I gave him a stare.
“It's official now. Let me put on a suit.”
I took a deep breath, looking down at my oversized shirt.
“Want to go shopping first?”
“How?”
“Downstairs.”
“Give me one of your black jackets, please, possibly a belt or some black tie type thing. Wait, yes, a black tie.”
I followed him up, nodding to myself. This might work or just be really bad.
I was slightly satisfied with my outfit. It was baggy even with it tied, but it almost looked like a blazer dress, and it was better than jeans and his oversized shirt.
“You look incredible.” Caspiens eyed me.
“Not too slutty?” I looked down at my bare legs. I only had short boots with me, and I didn’t want to show too much skin.
“You can walk around naked for all I care. It's your body. It's up to you how you want to show it off.” There was sincerity in his voice that made my stomach flip.
I thought all Alphas would be possessive in a domineering way. But with Caspien, it was different.
I could belong to him without him owning me.