My head was hurting, my mouth was dry, and I coughed the slightest when I blinked a few times when I looked up at the white ceiling. where the hell was I? I thought that I had been home in my apartment the first second making me have a small strike of fear before realising that I wasn’t when I looked around the room to see the white walls and structures of a hospital room, I knew since I had been in one the last time.
I blinked some more when my eyes moved over the room only to have my heart stop when I saw Jonah. He was sleeping in a chair next to me, my hand where in his and he was holding it still in his sleep when I just stared at him. he looked tired, like he hadn’t slept for a few days, and he had the same clothes on from when I saw him in the elevator, did that mean that it was the same day? What the hell had happened?!
I remembered the last part, about me telling him to go to hell and leave me alone and…. I closed my eyes still feeling his hand over mine, the heat was amazing, and I loved every second of it, I did, fuck.
I just kept looking at him, sleeping, back with his head, like he had fallen asleep against his will not wanting to let go off me and my heart made some more beats when I smiled at him, he looked adorable. he was cute all relaxed, small twitches’ making his otherwise handsome face perfectly beautiful, he looked amazing, even if he was tired.
I frowned when the door opened and a white dressed nurse came inside, she had a tray with her and looked at me confused like she wasn’t expecting me to be awake and I frowned more, the trey had coffee and some sandwiches on it, really? Was that for me or for him? I stared at the two coffees and just made an upset sounds when I yanked my hand back and felt betrayed again, he just couldn't fucking help himself couldn’t he? He just had to flirt and try to fuck the cute obvious willing nurse.
He woke up by me taking back my hand and he made a deep intake of air and blinked a few times before meting my hurt accusing eyes that he didn’t understand before seeing the girl with the tray and dropped the smile he had on his face completely standing himself up and correcting his clothes like he hadn’t been sleeping here with me.
I was lying down; my body was heavy, and I felt the slight buzz of pain medication that I was sure they were giving me when she cleared her throat not missing my hostility even if she was just looking at him.
“Oh, you’re up! That’s good news, I will tell the nurses that you are awake!” she sounded cheerful and peppy giving Jonah a wink when she left and I just made a scoff when he sat down again and took the coffee, drinking while he observes me.
He didn’t say sorry, or even explained why he was here when I told him to fuck off, but did he even care, did I even want him to go away? I just stroked my fingers over the surprisingly soft bedlinen, still refusing to speak first of us.
“Stop with the fucking silent treatment, right now Andrea.” He was done with his coffee, and I just stared into the roof, narrowing my eyes, no. I wasn’t going to stop, not after what happened, I didn’t deserve that, I really didn’t even if I was a useless piece of trash.
He sighed and got up, putting the cup down and bended himself over me, so that his face was right above mine and I tried to stop myself from inhaling his scent, only to fail miserably and making him smirk being fully aware what I was doing.
“I know what he did, and he has paid for it, I promise.” I snapped my eyes at his serious ones, and I believed him, I did, for some reason, I had always done that, trusted him, that he never came with an empty threat or promise, he was charming and dangerous like that, making me loose my senses when he was around, shit.
“He called me your bitch….” I said the words hurt and raspy from not talking and he just smiled back at me with warmth in his eyes this time like I had said something funny, and I frowned at his reaction before he answered me back, still just hoovering above my face with his own one.
“you’re not my bitch, he is.” He smiled more when I started to laugh, what? I really hadn’t expected that answer when he just got happier that I was giggling instead of giving him the cold shoulder when I felt relief in my chest, I really did, but I still was hurt, and I had meant every word to when he came chasing after me, I was never going back to that place, never.
I was just going to tell him that when his lips attacked mine, made me moan the slightest of his tongue that I welcomed not even stopping him, he tasted so good, the flavour of sweet mint mixed with coffee filling up my mouth and mind when the door opened and two women came inside, one looked shocked and the other one was smirking like she didn’t care what was happening.
he didn’t even move away or stopped before he was done and then he kissed my lips soft making me breathless before getting back up and looked at the hospital staff like he didn’t care that he kissed me Infront of them making my heart go crazy, he just fucking kissed me! in public, that was a huge step and I wanted to scream from the joy that was going throughout my body, Jonah kissed me!
“Miss Wilson, if you and your boyfriend are done, maybe I could talk to you…” I looked at the tag, she was the doctor and the other one, that was still shocked was a nurse when Jonah sat down again and this time, he took my hand in his and tangled our fingers looking at the two women casually like he didn’t just shove his tongue down my throat Infront of them.
“So how are you feeling? Nausea? Headaches? Dizzy?” I nodded at everything she said when she nodded back, making the nurse scribble something down on her chart, or my chart, I guess.
“Well, it’s the drugs making you like that, its not the most fun side effects to have, but at least you are not squirming in pain.” She shifted her eyes to Jonah, a small glimpse of amusement caught her eyes again making me blush, still feeling the taste of him on my lips, he didn’t seem to care, just watch the two women with his mysterious eyes.
“The bloodwork looks good, and I just checked your x-rays, you got lucky, it’s a hairline fracture on your right hip, I don’t even know how you were being able to walk, it’s extremely painful, like giving birth apparently…” she stopped when I got sad again, yeah, that was probably the only pain close to that I would ever feel, I was over thirty and time was not on my side, and Jonah had already made it clear that me and him were never having kids, and I didn’t blame him, he was young and I was older, we wanted different things in life, and that just how things were between us.
Still sucked though.
“Well, that means that you will I best case need rehabilitation, and in worst case, an operation, but I’m hoping it doesn’t go that far, you are still young and should bounce back, in time of course.” I felt the tension of Jonah’s hand when she said operation and I got scared, how hard had that fucker pushed me for me to have a fucking operation to my hip?!
“Operation…?” I just whispered that feeling the warm hand around mine, squeezing it tighter, was he scared to or was I imagined it?
“Oh, that’s like I said, a worst-case scenario if you don’t heal up like you should, but I can’t stress enough how important it is for you not to move around the first days at home, so no going outside and keep your hip elevated, oh and no sex.” She looked at Jonah this time when he raised his eyes back like he couldn’t believe what she was telling him making me nervous, maybe he didn’t want me around anymore, now that he couldn’t just fuck me?
The ice in my veins made me tremble, fuck! how would I survive if I couldn’t get help from him, from anyone? I lived alone and only had my shitty ex-husband being on a Caribbean beach and my parents that were never going to help me, never.
“I got it.” He just answered her when she smiled back, I bet she thought he looked hot, because he did, even when he was here with me, for God knows how long, he looked just as good as he always did.
“We need to keep you here for some time more, but I promise you will se your boyfriend soon enough again outside these walls.” She smirked again when I blushed, I didn’t have the guts to tell them, that he was in fact not my boyfriend, just my hot neighbour that liked to fuck me.
They had hardly left the room before he turned around to me and I was already holding my breath, knowing that I was not going to like what he said to me.
“I’m not your boyfriend Andrea. Just because it’s easier to make people don’t poke their noses in our business, doesn’t mean that we magically became a couple.” He sounded so cold when I just gulped hard from his face, looking stern and I just nodded not saying a word back, sure, I already knew that I did… so why did it fucking hurt so much every time he told me?
He just looked grimmer when he got up and I looked surprised at him? Was he leaving? Why? I knew that I looked like a lost puppy when he didn’t look back and just took out his phone, like he was busy all the sudden.
“ I need to leave; I already spent enough time here making sure you where okay.” He was walking out when I grab a hold of the helm his sweatshirt that made him stop for a fraction of a second before shaking me off, making the heavy sadness in my chest, take a hold of me tighter.
“Call me when you get out of here, I come back and get you.” He didn’t even turn around and I stared at his backside when he disappeared from my view, leaving me feeling just as alone as I was.
Bastard.
I sniffled not being able to do more, the drumming hurt of his rejection felt just as bad, every fucking time, and still I came back for more……I sniffled again when I closed my eyes letting the silent tears roll down my cheeks and just hated being me, he said one thing, but he was here, when nobody else was, not my family or friends only him.
So, I guess that was it then, the only form of some support I had in my life, was the cold-hearted neighbour that I before waking up had told to fuck off, and now, I needed him more than ever.